Laughing to Rebel.
I have many emotions dripping from me like Salvador Dali’s elements, and I feel like they are about to burst forth and I can’t hold them in.
And what do I do?
I choose a canvas that is fleeting enough so that I can instantly forget why I exploded in the first place. And my canvas is called laughter. By laughter, I am an artist.
Laughter is the greatest form of rebellion.
It steals you by the speed of sound from the mind to the heart where there is more room to hold contradictions without fear. To rebel against the limits of the mind, of hurts, of expectations is better done with a hearty dose of unsettling laughter.
I have many different laughs.
Some are deliberate such as those that I let out in front of people I’m not comfortable with and sounds like a bleat when not executed properly. Some are so restricted that they pass through my nose even with my mouth wide open. Some are hearty and comfortingly shared. Some are involuntary and sounds disgusting as if my tongue were hanging from my lips as I choke — those are the devious ones.
I’m notorious for my laughter. Only a few people have a laugh that sounds as disturbing as it is endearingly timed and intended.
“Comfort the afflicted, afflict the comforted,” that’s what I’m told.
How absurd is laughter!
Letting out air and sound in such a manner! It is like passing gas in public with a blatant blare. And yet it is often most welcome with a smile. But some laughters are not done with smiles but with tears that show how deprived of happiness one has been. Laughter can be done with eyes so wide, almost like a threat to anyone willing to question its motive or context.
Laughter is defiance. I laugh because I am angry.
I laugh because this world has not found its reason. I laugh because it has been a while and I still cannot find my place in finding the relevance of the deprivation of many. I laugh because despite hundreds of geniuses in my lifetime, human inequalities remain unresolved. I laugh because it has little to do with genius but more to do with how good we work together, and why is that so hard to believe?
There is no room for overthinking anymore. We have overthought long enough.
When we drill down to the causes of our problems, we are not asking the right questions. And the ultimate question is, why can’t it be easy? I laugh again. The question is not why are people terrible, but why they cannot be great? What’s stopping them? I laugh again — and with a double dose of disbelief.
I am raising my fist at myself.
I am paralyzed with inaction.
I have fears of risking my comfortable time on my couch. I laugh at my own stupidity! This is not rebellion! This is inaction! I must rise and walk armed with laughter! If anyone should offend me, I will laugh!
I will love laughing because everyone deserves to love it. It is the comfort of the gods, a glimpse of their power to look at challenges the size of boogers. It is all manageable rolled between our thumb and finger.
I breathe therefore I laugh.