Hot Sex for Real Yogis.

 

{Photo via Cameron Shayne}

{Photo via Cameron Shayne}

Are you intrigued, concerned, or offended?

Certainly you fall into one of these categories, if not possibly blurring the lines of each.

But why so easily seized by the combination of two words? Could it be that we are culturally and socially programmed not to mix our spirituality and our sexuality, as though they are somehow in contradiction or even opposition to one another? Or could it be because so many people are highly self conscious about sex in general, and it brings to the surface a spectrum of emotions—from shame, to socialized beliefs, to undisciplined addictions?

As an American I live in the most sexually ironic country in the world, and I should know, as I travel around the world for my passion and profession.

Nowhere do I see as much confusion between the overt American message that sex sells, and the socially awkward public discussion of it. Everyone wants it, everyone has it, everyone is driven by it, and yet we are still discomforted by the topic. 

I am highly passionate about everything I do. Sex just happens to be one way in which I express my creativity, spirit and yoga. Yes, I said yoga.

To be clear, yoga for me is a living, breathing, dynamic mystery that changes with me, because of me, and through me daily. It is not a class that I take, a subject that I teach, or a product that I buy or sell. Yoga is rather a reflection and expression of the most vital part of me, which is my aware and conscious mind manifest through my emotional, mental, and physical bodies. The part of me that knows that I am a me, inside of this exoskeleton.

This is why I have never sold yoga, and never will. What I offer is me. I am a personified version of living yoga like anyone who consciously works to unify breath, body, and mind to create a single expression of self. And for all those who believe that yoga can be qualified or defined by one individual, well, you’re right. You are always right. Best of luck with that.

 

Bad Sex.

Lets talk about sex, bad sex specifically. I am referring to the sad state of the sexually downtrodden, uneducated, and those who suffer because of them. You can’t imagine how many people I teach, on a daily basis, whose bodies read like a book turned open to chapter one: I suck in bed. But not in the good, I-suck-in-bed kind of way. I am referring to people who have lost, never had, or simply misplaced their body awareness.

I truly try not to, but at times I can only imagine these people as they, in the most careless and bungling manor, attempt to pleasure another person. If there is anything that I have learned over the course of my short 41 years on this planet, as a movement arts teacher for almost 30 of those years, is that the way you move anything, is the way you move everything. It is in fact the Budokon University official motto.

With that said I must tell you the level of disconnect between the emotional, physical and mental body is, in my opinion, at a crisis point. The most common issues being, lack of coordination, stamina, rhythm, and agility. People are mentally and physically rigid, disconnected and weak. They complain if movement is complex, requires strength or thoughtfulness, or simply doesn’t give them a sense of immediate gratification.

And this person is allowed to have sex? You simply cannot have hot sex if I ask you to tilt your pelvis in my yoga class, and instead you unknowingly lift your entire upper torso. Or, if you can’t hold a low push up without shaking, gasping for air, or at all for that matter. For your partner’s sake, figure out that your sexual potential is measured by your body’s ability to articulate subtle, delicate, and even cunning movements. All focused on bringing you and your partner to a state of out of body cosmic bliss.

However, the physical and emotional bodies must be tuned properly to perform the very skillful ritual that is sex. The bodies must be sharp, accurate, responsive and most of all sensitive to subtle changes in the environment, i.e. your partner’s body, breath, and energy. A good Yoga asana practice can and should cultivate these same qualities simply because they are necessary for your asana practice to be fruitful.

Sure you can copulate for the sake of baby making, if you are a chimpanzee. The rest of us should not have to suffer from your unresolved quarrel with Charles Darwin. And yes, you can practice yoga asana just to get in shape and burn calories, but then you are just to be moving around without intention to yoke, bind and unify. Chimpanzee do that too.

 

Hot Sex. 

Now, lets talk about hot sex. First of all, I understand very well that you can have incredible sex with a partner without being a Cirque du Soleil contortionist. I understand that making love is at its highest expression an emotional and spiritual yoking, binding, joining.

But what if that act could be more artful, more graceful, less laborious and less clumsy? What if blocked energy was moving and flowing in the physical, emotional and spiritual bodies? After all, the yogis of days gone by began asana training not because they were failing to achieve samadhi (enlightened states), but because they sought to be more comfortable while doing so.

I propose this to be our very motivation. The opportunity to take our unification with another person to a higher state of art. An act void of the modern task-orientated, distracted and lazy mind. A thing that we do as a celebration and communication with someone we love, because we are in service to them.

Sex is a demonstration of your concern and care for another’s well being. It just happens to be mutually beneficial, like all things. But what are we communicating if our asana practice or our sex is lazy, weak, exhausted, void of endurance and emotional content, and quite frankly sloppy?

Hot sex is, after all, a skillful and liberating dance that combines the breath, the body and the mind. It is the freeing of inhibitions, limitations and restrictions. It is the untangling and unblocking of channels of energy so that the body and mind are light, free and fully expressed. There is no suffering. A unification with the divine that is within you. Sounds like yoga to me.

 

{Photo via Cameron Shayne}

{Photo via Cameron Shayne}

Details. 

Yoga reveals strength and courage. It develops character and right action in the body and mind. In sex these qualities are essential. When a women feels safe she can be vulnerable, free and unguarded. When a man feels capable, strong and wanted he can move tenderly, gracefully and powerfully. When we learn to move our bodies free of self judgment, free of pain, free of shame we can truly integrate our yoga practice into all parts of our lives.

The way we move on the mat is, in a metaphoric sense, the way we move throughout every area of our lives. Sex is no exception. When you move through your asana practice, work to develop a more attuned sense of detail. Look for the subtle rather than the gross within your posture.

Become attuned to the rise and fall of the breath, the origin of action, the direction of energy throughout. Move as one unified being rather than an assemblage of moving parts that are unaware of one another. This attention to detail creates fire, fire creates heat, heat creates expansion of the mind and body. Expansion creates space, space creates possibility.

 

Open your eyes. 

What are you afraid of? Are you intimidated to truly see a person, or be seen by them? I have had my share of lovers that simply could not look me in the eyes. It was for them too confronting, too personal, and they were terrifyingly transparent. They could share their body, but not their soul. This denial of what is, this guarding of your self in order to preserve parts of yourself are robbing you of truth.

What if you were to surrender completely to the moment, to the choice you made, to the union? This is where your yoga lies waiting for you. No where to run and hide and be safe from your pain. Yoga and sex are both places that should be a space for healing. You are in both spaces incredibly open and vulnerable.

Open your eyes and see what is in front of you, reflecting back at you, waiting for you to anchor your vision (Drishti) and connect to. In our yoga practice we use our vision as a way to guide and direct our energy. In sex it is the same.

 

Listen. 

Yoga and sex are ultimately one expression. Just as you and I are one collective being conscious of our individual experience, so are yoga and sex two expressions of one grand dance we are in together.

When making love you should take the same level of care as you would in your asana practice. It is after all a sacred act of communion and communication. Each moment, like each asana being fully explored, never rushing or forcing. Surrender the rigid, graceless and unskilled transition from one asana the next. Find rather the circular course of energy and breath as you glide from moment to moment, breath to breath.

Listen, listen, listen. What is being said? That is how you know what is coming next. The body is speaking to you. Are you listening? There is no injury possible when you slow down and experience the breath united with the body.

 

Slow down. 

Slow down. Speed hides deficiency in both yoga and sex. Nothing worse than a man in bed racing toward the finish line—unless requested—and skipping over all of the details. The same holds true for an asana practice. Of course I always say, you can’t teach or demonstrate what you don’t know. And knowing is learned through attention to the subtle body (mental), the gross body (physical), and the causal body (spiritual).

Great sex is a conversation where two people are listening, sharing, and learning about each other. Bad sex is when someone talks over you the entire time about me, me, me.

Ironically our yoga practice is a communication between the mind and body. The mind is often racing through, paying no attention to the details and feedback from the body. The result is often injury and/or chronic pain from mindless exploitation of soft tissue. Sex can easily result in the same outcome of injury, usually emotional, but injury just the same.

It feels quite lonely and empty when you share a sacred space with someone who is self-consumed, insensitive and worse of all, someone who thinks they are really rocking your world.

The most concerning aspect of it all is how many people only know and are willing to accept mediocre sex and mediocre yoga. They cannot imagine something outside of their own sphere of experience. They cannot imagine reaching heights of intimacy and pleasure that are traversed by only those willing to do the work in both practices.

 

*****

 

{Art of Attention}

 

 

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Cameron Shayne
Both a martial artist, and student of yoga and zen mediation, Cameron Shayne’s 30 years of personal practice and teaching has culminated into the world renowned art of Budokon. Beginning at the age of 12, Cameron discovered the martial and zen arts, which he practiced devoutly until being introduced to yoga in his twenties. In 1999 Cameron began integrating life coaching, yoga, and martial arts into a single therapeutic system that he named Budokon (Way of the Spiritual Warrior). Cameron is also an author, international speaker and founder of Budokon University, which trains and certifies Budokon Yoga teachers, Martial Artists and life coaches worldwide. “The way we move reflects the way we think. The way we think reflects the way we live. The way we live reflects the world we create. Therefore the art of our movement is always and forever affecting the art of our living."

84 Comments

  • yogamasterji commented on May 31, 2013 Reply
    So, Enjoy the beauty of living.
  • blackdirtgoddess commented on May 31, 2013 Reply
    provocative and ballsy article; its a very commendable topic~ hard to address but excruciatingly important to understand. accolades for you fearlessness. :)
    • Cameron Shayne commented on May 31, 2013 Reply
      Grateful you took the time to read it and share your thoughts :)
  • Raphan Kebe commented on May 31, 2013 Reply
    Cameron, I always enjoy your essays.. But I do think this one is your best one so far. Speaking (& moving) from one’s core seems to enable one to blur that line between gross and subtle; it’s a great thing in my book. Many thanks for the inspiration, keep it up brotherman…
    • Cameron Shayne commented on June 1, 2013 Reply
      Thank you brother :)
    • Belle commented on August 29, 2013 Reply
      I completely agree Raphan. What is your book?
  • fleur commented on May 31, 2013 Reply
    My Life has just become more beautiful:)
  • Victoria Erickson commented on May 31, 2013 Reply
    Beautiful!!!!
  • Carolyn Riker
    Carolyn Riker commented on May 31, 2013 Reply
    Tasteful. Compelling. Intelligent. Stimulating all senses and highly appreciated.
  • SR Atchley
    SR commented on May 31, 2013 Reply
    Amen. Finally getting to the root of things! YES! Thank you.
    • Cameron Shayne commented on June 1, 2013 Reply
      Gratitude SR :)
    • Shirl commented on February 13, 2015 Reply
      I was really confused, and this answered all my quisteons.
  • Martine commented on May 31, 2013 Reply
    We need more of this kind of discussion! Thank you Cameron for sharing yourself and your wisdom.
  • chris commented on May 31, 2013 Reply
    I find your beliefs very interesting. Pragmatically, I don’t think they would serve many people well, but in certain communities, they may be a step in the right direction. I think you show a lot of intellectual potential. I hope at some point you will make some serious investment in studying traditional yoga philosophy as well as vedanta. There are some teachers out there that could really help bring a little more clarity and wisdom to some of the ideas you have expressed here.
    • Cameron Shayne commented on June 1, 2013 Reply
      Chris, thank you for your confidence in my intellectual potential. I will take your advice and invest into a serious study of yoga philosophy in hopes that I might gain the wisdom and insight to measure, as you have, my depth of spiritual and yogic knowledge. CS
      • chris commented on June 1, 2013 Reply
        I’m pleased you caught my meaning. My issue with this article is that it has potency to increase readers insecurities which is counter to advaita vedanta’s message that through all apparent changes we are already perfect. It also asks people to improve their sexual prowess which is contrary to the Yoga Sutra’s teachings on Brahmacarya which recommends sexual restrain before and while one begins a meditation program. It is also problematic form the standpoint of the Gita which traces suffering back to unmet desires. Even from the standpoint of Tantric Sadhana such as sri vidya and others it is inappropriate because things like this are supposed to be taught carefully and not out in the open for the masses. Kaula Tantricas are secretive because not all are qualified due to the obvious potential for abuse and sorrow that would occur from unmet desires. Now the cool thing is, you have the freedom to do all this. It is part of your unique journey and I applaud your extremely voracious efforts. Just be aware there are karmic consequences to your actions that according to tradition will make it very hard for you to gain a resolved mind and a heart that is not constantly chasing after the next experience. No special sexual experience is needed to know that you are the source of your own happiness. The sex only allows that inner reality to be known for a short while But self knowledge is well beyond this limited experience. Please understand that though I am one individual writing this, I am representing a many thousands of year old vision. I wish to sincerely tell you that I appreciate and can see your uniqueness and helpfullness to everyone around you. But I do think you are immediately capable of grasping the truth of what i am saying and so I hope you find it helpful just as you hope your readers find you helpful.
        • Cameron Shayne commented on June 10, 2013 Reply
          :)
        • Leighann C commented on November 24, 2013 Reply
          I’m going to be completely authentic with you, Chris. You are very knowledgable. AND you sound totally self-righteous. Humans more commonly tend to be concerned about being right over being happy; you may want to consider whether all of what you wrote came from a place of the pleasure of being right. That is most certainly how it occurs to me. And that type of expression, my friend, is inauthentic. Cameron: Marry me.
          • chris commented on March 4, 2014
            I will consider your question, it is fair and perceptive. I would encourage you to look up the meaning of authentic. It is not a word that can mean anything that you disagree with.
          • Marisa Harnadh commented on December 21, 2014
            Hahaha <3 I get Cameron FULLY! I feel she wove her wisdom beautifully. Sex unless done with Reverence (Sacred/Tantra) I find empty and hits a ceiling. Yoga does help in so many ways, ALTHO it still baffles me how most practitioners remain un-conscious. In time …. I suppose. Oh on the principle of Yogic 'philosophies' and that vedanta stuff… oh gosh, human minds have been mental orgasms through that (rendering the body useless)! Life is just too short.
  • Tanya Lee Markul
    tanya lee markul commented on May 31, 2013 Reply
    I want to read this at least 1,000 times more. (And, the photos are absolutely stunning.) Thank you! xoxo
  • Honey commented on June 1, 2013 Reply
    “And this person is allowed to have sex?” After reading this article I feel like “hot sex” is defined as something only accessible exclusive to the physically powerful and the spiritually “advanced”. I agree on principle with many of these ideas, however, I would appreciate an acknowledgment that not everyone who has these attributes (eg eyes to look with, the ability to do vinyasa, good spacial awareness) is excluded from experiencing sexuality with their higher consciousness. Thank you for sharing these ideas.
    • Crys commented on June 1, 2013 Reply
      I would agree. Neither my partner or I practice yoga or anything like it. I have no idea if either of us could hold a low push up without shaking; no acrobatics like that have ever been required for us to have hot sex! Our heat comes from our energy & our awareness, our polarity & our surrender. We have had hot sex thru periods of physical disability for each of us. Thank goodness no-one has ever taken away our right to have sex! But I agree that the quality of attention to one’s partner’s needs and rhythms is critical to satisfying union.
      • Cameron Shayne commented on June 1, 2013 Reply
        Dear Crys – Possibly the article title eluded you, “Hot sex for Real Yogis.” In other words, I am talking to YOGA practitioners. It is understandable that you might not identify with the context. Next time I will try a title closer to “If you are not a yogi, I am not talking to you” With love Cameron
        • Belle commented on August 29, 2013 Reply
          Hey Cameron, What disturbs me about your post is that it’s condescending. Both with yogis and non-yogis. I’m writing a book about sex & quantum physics and more than knowing *a lot* about the subject, I enter states of Nirvana through it. However I never-ever portray or think of myself as better than anyone. It was really hard work to shed so much old skin – and finally pierce through the other side. And I totally remember my early days. If you remember people’s inner hardships you can be more *compassionate* in your writing – only then you can talk “into their listening” – because they will relate to what you’re saying. Right now you’re not talking “with” people, you’re talking “at” them. Who are you writing to? Youngsters, older people, men, women? Who is your audience? I’m curious. Belle
          • Cameron Shayne commented on September 12, 2013
            Dear Belle. I don’t write for an audience. Like any artist, I write to express my perception and provoke thought. I am not trying to sell a product, such as a book. I am not interested in interfering in peoples beliefs or ideologies. I am only offering a truth from one perspective as all truth is subjective. So why waste my time trying to change what is. People who read my work and related enjoyed it as you can read below. People who did not relate were disturbed, as you can read below. You fall where you fall. With love Cameron
          • Crystal Hoffman commented on February 12, 2014
            Hey Belle! I’d love to hear more about your book!
        • jesse commented on January 22, 2015 Reply
          I think you’re an egomaniac. I am a yogi. I can appreciate an effort to be confident, but I think these are ideas you’ve invented yourself and are your own devotee. As for you’re other article on sleeping with students, i don’t think your yoga practice is leading to heightened connection with others, but a lessened connection, as a whopping ego does. Interesting that this is foretold as a peril, but you don’t seem to notice it in your own writing. When I go to a yoga class, I’m not looking to buy ‘you’, and I mean you specifically.
    • Cameron Shayne commented on June 1, 2013 Reply
      Honey, as requested, I acknowledge that not everyone, including people who do not have eyes, are excluded from experiencing sexuality with their higher consciousness. :) Much love Cameron
  • Gaby commented on June 1, 2013 Reply
    Wow. Love it:)
  • JLA commented on June 2, 2013 Reply
    While this article written somewhat well, it’s also extremely pretentious. If someone can’t hold a push up to your standards, their soul may still be fulfilled sexually. Many people are aware of energies other than their own, they just don’t tilt their pelvis the “correct” way. Maybe they have the kind of sex they want to have, whatever kind of sex that may be. Maybe they go home to a partner that fulfills every sexual desire they have ever dreamed of, so what if they can’t get into crow pose? Does it have to be yogi sex for someone to enjoy it? No. This article was good, but so incredibly judgmental and dogmatic that I could hardly get through it.
    • Leelaja commented on June 2, 2013 Reply
      As the first line of this article mentions, you may be intrigued, concerned, or offended by the title, and therefore the material to follow. No physical standards were established, as that’s not what yoga is about. Yoga is different for everyone and sex is different for everyone. Everyone has different abilities, strengths, and weaknesses. I think you’re missing the point here. The article also describes the emotional aspects of hot sex, and acknowledges the connection between physical, emotional, and spiritual surrender. As Cameron also stated above, if you don’t practice yoga yourself, you may not relate to the context.
    • Cameron Shayne commented on June 3, 2013 Reply
      Dear JLA, Apologies if my article landed as pretentious for you. It was and still is written for the YOGA audience and therefore is understandably offensive to those that would read it and omit that important detail. I ask that you forgive my exclusion of other sexual practitioners, preferences, and orientations (as the non yogic gay community seemed equally offended), or take up a yoga practice and revisit the article down the road a bit. With love CS
      • Cameron Shayne commented on June 3, 2013 Reply
        Dear Leelaja, I celebrate your keen reading comprehension skills, coupled with you’re ability to decipher context :) With much gratitude and love Cameron
  • Genevieve commented on June 5, 2013 Reply
    So beautiful. Thank you <3
  • Jane Bryson commented on June 6, 2013 Reply
    Fantastically explored and explained. I agree with my entire body and spirit. Thank you for articulating something so significant in a direct, clear, warm manner. Will be sharing! Peace, brother.
    • Cameron Shayne commented on June 6, 2013 Reply
      Thank you Jane. I appreciate the articulate critique. Much love CS
      • jrcarey commented on June 6, 2013 Reply
        HAHAHA, love the reactions! Love you! Reminds me that opinions are very revealing of where one is at… what if we can just keep living through this human experience with more love and less opinion. Yogi translation- empty mind, full heart !
  • Prof. D commented on June 6, 2013 Reply
    Awesome article! as usual, creating nice waves! I must confess, when i saw the article I hoping to get the step-by-step walkthough of how to have hot sex! ha!! Kancho, one more time your expertise in the martial arts shows through your yoga… This reminds me of the tibetan monks that may practice some really flashy kung fu techniques at a park, just to catch you attention and then share with you some deep dharma. Like a literary ninja you used the smoke bomb of “sex” to catch most peoples attention and get away with while leaving behind a really deep message… Some may get mesmorized the explosion, blinded by the smoke… Others, may want to chose to take a step back, wait until the commotion clears and see what the intention was. “The way you do anything is the way you do everything” I think, this is not about sex or increasing your sexual prowess. Neither it is about being a cirque du soleil performer or holding a pushup… There is an underlying message of self awareness and self commitment. A reminder to all yogis to realize that yoga is much more than a workout on a mat but a tool to self discovery that is best used when united with the rest of your life, and not compartmentalized as “something you do in a class”, rather a way of living. If the sex thing still triggers you, the ninja of fear or shame that lives within you just kicked you…. read again. get angry if you have to. I found a lot of interesting stuff coming up for me! thanks for that! Oh, i got caught up in the hot sex talk and just realized I m late for class!
    • Cameron Shayne commented on June 7, 2013 Reply
      Thanks professor D. You are always showing up with great insight and the practiced ability to see through the mud and mire of stories and limiting beliefs. What ever trickery it takes to get people to look more deeply, I just may use it. ;) Love you brother! CS
    • Marisa Harnadh commented on December 21, 2014 Reply
      Yeah!
  • Teri commented on June 7, 2013 Reply
    Chris, you sound as if you as trying to prove that you really know something … hahaha. Beginners mind serves us all. I think you also show a lot of intellectual potential, but your statement “Please understand that though I am one individual writing this, I am representing a many thousands of year old vision.” is quite arrogant, and very funny. You might want to check you premise that you are representing anything other than yourself. Namaste.
    • Cameron Shayne commented on June 10, 2013 Reply
      Dear Teri – Thank you :) Chris seemed to miss the ironic tone in my reply due to his own deep need to be right, and to be heard. The rest of us with intelectual potential will keep trying to get it right. Much love CS
      • chris commented on September 19, 2013 Reply
        Enjoy your beginner’s mind Teri.
      • chris commented on September 19, 2013 Reply
        I did get the tone. I was attempting to write something that matched the arrogance of the article, mainly for fun, which I think I did. You really should study a traditional yoga text though seriously.
  • Teri commented on June 7, 2013 Reply
    Cameron, good article. Thanks for writing.
  • akismet-34be78050230afbbe9538fc58ecb41b8 commented on June 9, 2013 Reply
    I do yoga but am also disabled. I can’t do every pose like I used to before my back injury, but that doesn’t stop me from having body and mind awareness. My injury actually brought me back to my yoga and has taught me more than I can imagine about surrender and loving myself just as I am. I have hot sex with someone who doesn’t do yoga at all. Does he look into my eyes? Yes, and because I DO yoga he is given a ride into the kind of bliss that takes him way out of his normal sphere of awareness as well. Yoga also brought me back to having great, hot sex when I was told that my spine was too fragile to hold the weight of a partner. Ha! I don’t care who the article was written for- it moved me and made me even more determined to be even more aware the next time I am on the mat- or between the sheets with my beloved. Limiting beliefs are for those that want to be limited. I don’t follow that path. I embrace, enjoy, love and move. I can’t do crow anymore either, but that doesn’t stop me from taking what you said and smoothly mixing it into my consciousness like I mix two colors of oil paint together, slow and sweetly. Thank you for writing it. It’s a wonderful reminder to each of ourselves.
    • Wow Word press gave me a very weird name but I’m Jana. Nice to meet you:-) Namaste….
    • Cameron Shayne commented on June 10, 2013 Reply
      Akismet :) What a beautiful message! I was genuinely moved by your story, and your ability to see that I was referring not to physical prowess, but to using what you have gracefully, consciously, and yogically (if you are a yogi) in everything you do :) Love CS
  • blisstival commented on June 9, 2013 Reply
    Count me in as intrigued. Interesting – whether we are discussing yoga asana, physical training, martial arts – anything worthwhile where skill and technique are crucial to proficiency – we accept, without hesitation, that one cannot achieve mastery without the guidance and direction of a bona fide master. Yet when it comes to the art of making love, our Western society – and indeed most societies – have put so much stigma and privacy on nudity and sexuality that there are very few opportunities to receive such guidance. How would a live, “How to make love – bring your own partner” class go over?
    • Cameron Shayne commented on June 10, 2013 Reply
      I am working on this Blisstival as well as turning this subject into an ongoing dialogue :) Check my facebook page (cameron shayne) for updates! Until then, much love. CS
  • M commented on June 11, 2013 Reply
    I try to keep light hearted when reading, so as not to place judgement on myself or others. I’ve been in a period of abstinence, in part, due to just the bad sex mentioned above. I would love to believe that taking my time, slow in the initiation even…to find a partner and then together to decide to have sex, would make all of the above come more naturally, as it has, at least once, in the past. Thanks for helping me feel like I just ain’t alone in this journey!
    • Cameron Shayne commented on June 13, 2013 Reply
      You are not alone M. Many people, especially women, are frustrated these days with the lack of sensitivity and vulnerability of men. I am hoping this ongoing blog will help shed light and new perspectives for those less aware of nature of true love making. With love CS
  • Jeffrey commented on June 11, 2013 Reply
    Ha, when I began reading the article, mostly from its heading, I assumed it had been written by a woman. As I continued reading I was struck by how arrogantly male/macho/egoic/competitive was the tone of the writing, and that its perspective—regardless of its claim—had little at all to do with the perspective of ‘real yoga.’ I would, however, accept it if the claim had been made that it was written by and for ‘real western hatha yogis,’ which is what far too many Americans consider yoga to be. I find the content and tone of this piece to confirm what Ammachi had to say about hatha yoga… that it tends to reinforce identification with the ego/body/mind, rather than liberate oneself therefrom. Of course, no one can help but be who the Real One has created each of us to be in the great worldly scheme. You are likely strongly influence by the astrological fire signs Aries, Sadge, and/or Leo… and/or the numerological influences of #1(Aries), #3(Sadge), or #9. God loves you just as you are (just as God made you!), and loves you TOO MUCH to let you stay that way!
    • Cameron Shayne commented on June 13, 2013 Reply
      Dear Jeffrey, Maybe i’m a little off base… but…you seem to have a definition of yoga that is a bit exclusive. You may consider broadening your definitions to allow everyone, including even us male/macho/egoic yogis from the west to play too. I find your “traditional” eastern yogic viewpoint seeped in judgment. If this is eastern yoga, then I opt out. However, your astrological skills are ON POINT – I am a Sagittarius. :) What’s your sign? We might be a match! With love from me and God!
  • Saira Maitreyi commented on June 12, 2013 Reply
    I just love your passion for life and how you show up as YOU are today. I hope that you are as happy and peaceful inside as you appear outside. xxx
    • Cameron Shayne commented on June 13, 2013 Reply
      Thanks Saira :) You are sweet, and I am happy inside and out! Thank you so much for your kind words. Love CS
  • Sylvain commented on June 13, 2013 Reply
    Surprising article….well written… I suppose someone who never lived a real unifification (sexually speaking) with his/her partner is far away to be able to understand the depth of the article. My twocents… See you in couple days in Montreal
    • Cameron Shayne commented on June 13, 2013 Reply
      Thank you so much Sylvain :) See you in Montreal soon!! Much love Cameron
  • tvsitcomdad commented on June 27, 2013 Reply
    Wonderful! As I learn though, I’m vexed by the contradiction between the reference to “me” in this essay and the path to enlightenment resulting in the loss of the “self” concept. Back to the books! Thanks Cameron :)
  • Gman commented on June 29, 2013 Reply
    Great stuff Kancho! I took excerpts and will use them in my teaching….
  • Sarah B commented on July 5, 2013 Reply
    Great article and I enjoyed a lot reading all the comments and different opinions! :) It’s so funny to observe how everyone is “touched” by your words, “where” it touches them and what they “do” with the info they have taken… thank you!
  • Branded commented on July 31, 2013 Reply
    Wow. I guess if you don’t have anything nice to say…. doesn’t apply here…lol. I thought the article was great and will be sending to my boyfriend. It’s amazing how many people are afraid of discipline. Being a dancer and yoga practitioner, I not only understood the article mentally, but I’ve had the pleasure of understanding it physically. Here’s the thing about knowledge, when it’s offered….take it people. No, everyone…especially those of you with no yoga practice or understanding, will be able to delight in the physical passions described above. But that doesn’t make the article untrue, pretentious, irrational or unattainable. It does make it out-of-the-ORDINARY, which is what I though rebellion was about? No one is saying your white bread sex isn’t ” McSteamy,” the author has just introduced y’all to some advanced level sex skills. Now if you’re not ready or don’t have the desire…fine. However the level of irritation and annoyance some of you have expressed in these comments suggest to me….perhaps you need some good, Hot Yoga Sex!!
    • Cameron Shayne commented on August 5, 2013 Reply
      Branded.. you gave me big smile.. thank you!
  • Iris commented on August 1, 2013 Reply
    Dear Cameron….you are not only a genius in moving your body but as well in using the right words and expressing what lots of people are afraid about…. expressing what they feel inside and letting it out, without bothering what others will think about it… Thanks for that….this is really a great article!!! I came over the Budokon hompage while searching for the right Yoga practice/training for me…looked at lots of your videos on Youtube and the more I see and read the more is growing my desire to partecipate at the Budokon 250 Yoga course. Can’t wait…. Love Iris
    • Cameron Shayne commented on August 5, 2013 Reply
      Thank you for the love and support Iris :) See you soon I hope.
  • Man's Ruin commented on August 13, 2013 Reply
    At first, I was somewhat offended–as most people, it was the “if someone can’t hold a low pushup” bit. Then…I realized that was my own damaged ego in the way. The article’s title–“Hot sex for real yogis”–actually sums it all up so well in five words. I am a dancer, but I have retired from the stage due to illness and the subsequent damage it did to my body. If someone wrote “Hot sex for real dancers” and it DIDN’T include a level of physical fitness in it, I’d be taken aback, and then note that I needed to get back to the barre again. Hot sex for any philosophy, lifestyle, or practice has to include all aspects of that field. Fitness is a significant part of being a yogi. You do not see 400 pound yogi’s, you do not see 200 pound professional dancers. And my offense at that line was based upon the fact I KNOW this deep down–I can’t currently hold a low push up, but I also cannot do horizontal and vertical splits at this time, or kick up to my head at this time. This article sums up succintly what many of us know, but have been afraid to utter in fear of revealing our own faults and damaging our ids and superegos.
  • Marty Johnson commented on August 15, 2013 Reply
    Wah! I tho’t this article was written by a female & was about to ask, but are there any males with this level of sensitivity? You answered my question! now to find one more……
  • Louise Shaw commented on August 16, 2013 Reply
    So, “You can’t imagine how many people I teach, on a daily basis, whose bodies read like a book turned open to chapter one: I suck in bed. But not in the good, I-suck-in-bed kind of way.” Ha hahahahaha . I I love yoga, I love sensuality and creativity and soooo appreciate a good lover. Do not underestimate your ability to be one, and to evolve and work on the subtleties of the practice. What a beautiful way to spend time. There is no need to deviate too much, when there is a love of refining the art.
  • kerri commented on September 16, 2013 Reply
    I have never heard anything like this before. It makes beautiful sense, and feels whole and right and good.
  • Agnes Brzeski commented on September 26, 2013 Reply
    Great article :) on much needed subject, thoughtful,informative …Glad you wrote it :)))
  • blackcoyote commented on September 27, 2013 Reply
    i read your articles…….. and i see through the hanging vines of words, the question to the answer. Peeling away, the mask as deep as the skin is blood…… why? .
  • Josephine commented on January 22, 2014 Reply
    “As Cameron also stated above, if you don’t practice yoga yourself, you may not relate to the context.” I don’t practice yoga and I think, believe, I could and did relate to aspects of the content. Ultimately, I feel it is about “creating a sacred space” however one can do that, whatever health/physical challenges one is facing. Yes, there are moments when ‘wham bam thank you mama’ may be appropriate however, the moments of union like a couple slow dancing is magical and if that could be replicated, with any necessary adjustments, yoga practitioner (or any other ‘flexibility’) or not, then it is a beautiful moment in time. Sex/making love is as much a physical activity as it is a mental/emotional one.
  • Sarah commented on March 3, 2014 Reply
    The article on whole is excellent and observational, so thank you for that. I am among those who take issue with the tone, early on. The problem is not that I do not understand. It is not to do with yogis vs. non-yogis. Questioning whether some people should be “allowed to have sex” is problematic, as is the repeated comparison to chimpanzees. It’s a tone problem, it’s insulting, and your response to this criticism so far has been to separate your audience into “us” and “them” — like anyone who disagrees with you must be part of that lessor form of primate. You don’t have to care what I think, of course, but I challenge you to hear the criticism this time, rather than deflect it.
  • Joey Atlas commented on June 17, 2014 Reply
    The similarities of mind-body communications found in Yoga and sex is incredibly defined. I really liked the article.

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