The Reminder of Truth.

image by (c)Jennifer Hillman

Image by (c)Jennifer Hillman.

“Heaven wheels above you, displaying to you her eternal glories, and still your eyes are on the ground” – Dante Alighieri



Breathe
.

That inner voice inside simply kept repeating this to me. My world crumbling and my physical being is shaking.

Breathe.

Feeling pulled apart and in two directions. Heaven and Earth. There is a sweetness breathing in both.

“What makes earth feel like hell is our expectation that it should feel like heaven.” – Chuck Palahniuk

Once being touched by the undeniable joy and love in Heaven, that feeling of belonging, trust, truth, knowing I was good, worthy and loved… is so seductive. Words just can’t describe that feeling within the void of creation, that darkness filled with immense love… tears come down my eyes from the intense joy I felt. I didn’t want to leave.

Nothing on Earth ever felt like that.

Nothing.

Then that pull of connection,  of responsibility on Earth… the beauty and grace of Mother Earth, laughter, hugs and smiles… Nothing was like that in the darkness of that moment. Differently beautiful and loving.

Seeing, touching, hearing, and being. It wasn’t like that in the Void of Creation, as I call it.

All in a blink of an eye, it happened. One moment, I was driving on a road trip, listening to music as my two friends slept on the long stretch of trees in Oregon when the oncoming headlights headed directly towards us. The friend in the front, waking to see and say, “What the hell is he doing in our lane?” We both looked at the clock. 10:48pm. And the world went into slow motion. I moved my hands down the steering wheel and turning strong to the right as the impact happened. Closed eyes and then that loving feeling overwhelmed me.

Surrounded in darkness and feeling of LOVE.
A firm voice whispered,
“You are Love and Loved. Don’t forget that.”

Next, I was hearing a woman’s voice talking to me, asking about my dogs. I just wanted to go back to that bliss. “Let me sleep, I whispered.” She wasn’t going to let that happen.

Opening my eyes, I saw my SUV’s hood up-close and too personally through the cracked windshield. I wondered why I am still alive. Why am I still here? Dreams of dying in a car accident a few years ago and yet I am still alive. Wait a minute… I felt anger building.

That soft inner voice only said, “Breathe Love. “

That moment was a moment of decision. I wonder if I made that decision or a higher power’s plan did when I have these moments of confusion come around. That reminder about the truth of who we truly are… Love and Loved. Hard to forget this, but it just seemed to tease me with that seductive bliss, only to return to this place of pain, greed and attempting to make sense of it all.

“The experience of eternity right here and now is the function of life. Heaven is not the place to have the experience; here is the place to have the experience.” – Joseph Campbell

It is moments with nature, friends and family’s laughter and smiles, counting the blessings of having that moment of remembrance…  we are here for the human experience. Everything is temporary. So I stop wondering and simply breathe in love. Simply breathe and be.

“You’ve gotta dance like there’s nobody watching, Love like you’ll never be hurt, Sing like there’s nobody listening, And live like it’s heaven on earth.” – William W. Purkey

 

*****

Genevieve DuBois
Genevieve DuBois is the pen name of Jennifer Hillman. Writer, Intuitive Life Coach, Reiki Master and NPL Practitioner. The sensual side of her personality embraces sexuality and sensuality of passion and the passionate nature – a vulnerable, nurturing truth with a strong determination, mixed with the fragility of the feminine. Embracing the very essence of the powerful Goddess that she truly is has been an ongoing process. Her writing is reflective of this process and inner growth. She has two books of poetry published in her Embracing Souls series, "Poetry of the Dance, Vol. One" and "Words of the Heart". Her radio show Abstract Illusions Radio explores creativity and spirituality weekly. Connect with Genevieve on Facebook and Twitter.
Genevieve DuBois

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