You Beautiful Disaster, Learn to Love You More Thru Self Acceptance.
“As I began to love myself I found that anguish and emotional suffering are only warning signs that I was living against my own truth. Today, I know, this is AUTHENTICITY.” ~ Charlie Chaplin on his 70th birthday.
Is there a difference between self acceptance and self esteem?
From my perspective (a perspective), self esteem often represents a very high or a very low — the extremities of how we think we feel about ourselves. A high self esteem can massage, appease and cover our insecurities and sooth our egos. In this state of mind, we attribute descriptive words (and feelings) about ourselves such as: worthy, lovable, good, decent, hire-able, acceptable, potential, etc.
While low self esteem can evoke powerful self deprecation, self pity and even anger. In this state of mind, we attribute descriptive words (and feelings) about ourselves such as: fat, ugly, not good enough, unworthy, lonely, misunderstood, confused, stupid, slow, unlovable, sad, etc.
I believe both sides have a profound propensity to make us feel even more judgmental, isolated and separate from ourselves and the life around us as such descriptive words are often used to appease our personal agendas and can very easily become egocentric, political and isolating.
So, what is self acceptance?
Some may call it compassion for the self or self love. I think it’s something that can only be defined individually and is a feeling that goes beyond descriptive words. It’s peace, it’s awareness, it’s the awareness of connectedness, it’s full of depth and it’s limitless.
The limitlessness that exists beyond descriptive words, no matter how self-destructive or self-empowering they are.
There is a deep wisdom in each and every one of us, but we tend to cover all this wisdom up with a rejection of ourselves. This rejection often comes in the form of excuses, egoism, fear, greed, anger, blame, etc. Thus, we use this rejection to assign descriptive words that try to either refute or confirm our perceived limitations.
However, there is an incessant desire, need and longing to know, love and accept ourselves — wholly and truly. This desire is inevitable and as we continue to deny it, we create great misery for ourselves and the life around us.
It is time to change our inner dialogue, to become truthful with who and what we are. This takes practice — it takes practice to truly hear our inner dialogue. It takes even more practice to allow this dialogue to change, to become truthful and to become real.
An investigation of this inner conversation… is it possible?
Is it possible to find the courage and openness to let go of all your dirty little secrets, blame and justifications that keep you from fully accepting who and what you are?
Is it possible to find the courage and openness to let go of all the experiences in your life where you’ve collected assumptions about who you are — all of them — especially the ones that are not or you don’t think are true?
Is it possible to find the courage and openness to let go of all the personal agendas you’re holding onto?
Is it possible to find the courage and openness to let go of the idea of trying to be perfect but instead allowing yourself to tap into the wisdom of your body? To feel?
Is it possible to find the courage and openness to forgive yourself and others for labeling you with all kinds of descriptive words, no matter if they are or were seemingly good or bad: great or horrific?
Is it possible to find the courage and openness to allow the things within you that aren’t evolving, to evolve?
Inspiration toward self acceptance…
Forget all the rewards and punishment regimes you execute on yourself. Learn to set healthy boundaries that set you free. And, start small. Start anywhere. Start right here, right now.
No more excuses.
No more blame.
No more seriousness.
Stop resisting the calling and wisdom of your body. Stop allowing yourself to be distracted by all the stories, labels, the events of the past and the worries of the future and go beyond ‘the scary’. Allow yourself to feel how comfortable, freeing and peaceful it can be to turn inward — to look within yourself.
You are more than what you think you are. Start building that trust and do this not by building yourself up then tearing yourself down with descriptive words but by inquiring and turning within.
You are limitless.