you and me

I Know What I’m Looking For… And I Will Know When It’s You.

I know what I’m looking for. I have no idea who it’ll be or when I will find him. I can’t picture his face or imagine his laugh. I’m not sure what angle his smile will turn or what color his eyes will be. His name is absolutely still a mystery.

I have no idea who you are or who you will be. But I know what I am looking for. And I will know once I’ve found you. I may not be sure what my hand will feel like in yours, but I am sure that I’ll be yours once our fingers interlace.

I don’t have a clue where you are or what you’re doing right this minute. I can only hope you’re wondering about me and how easy it’ll be to fall into me. I don’t know how I’m going to get to you. I simply know that I have to. I have to find you.

I know exactly what I’m looking for and I know that I haven’t found it — just yet. I have tried with an open mind and an open heart. I have loved, I have dated, I have small-talked, and I have slept with. But I haven’t found it. Not yet.

I’m not sure what you’re like and if I’ll even like you. I’m just dead sure that I will seriously love you even if I hate you. Even if I hate you for taking so long to find me. You’re out there, somewhere, and I will recognize you the moment you’re here.

I cannot dream up the way your body will mold into mine or the way your voice will fill every empty piece of me. My imagination can’t go far enough to know what home will smell like, but I know I’ll find it buried in your embrace.

I know exactly what I’m looking for. I know the love that I am meant for.

For now, I waste my time smiling at strangers with a hopeful glance. For now, I spend my chances on maybes across a dinner table. For now, I wake up awkwardly wishing I could go back to my dreams where maybe you’ll be one day.

I know that your first Hello will hold everything I’ve ever lost. I know that your first kiss will hold everything I stand to gain. A future. A forever. A history. Your smile will be the start to the only story I ever needed to be a part of.

I’m not claiming love at first sight. I can’t even do that because I can hardly see without contacts. I am claiming love at first feeling. I am claiming that I will know when you are near me. There’s an energy in you that I have been chasing my whole life.

I know exactly what I’m looking for and it’s going to take my breath away. It’s going to shake me from the deepest parts of my heart and cause an avalanche in my soul. All my fears and my worries will fall far, far away.

Because what will there be to fear once I find you?

I will know when it’s you. Your presence will bring a calming breeze while sparking a fire at my feet. Everything will feel right in the same moment where everything that ever felt wrong begins to make sense. It will make sense because of you.

I know what I am looking for, and it’s easy to say No to maybes until then. I can trip and fall, but I haven’t really fallen for my best friend. He is out there somewhere, I swear. And I will know when he comes for me, changes my world, and changes me.

I know what I’m looking for.

I just have yet to find you.

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Sonya Matejko
Sonya Matejko is a blogger and freelance writer who is vibrantly falling in love with life in Miami and around the world. Her writing is featured on a variety of high-profile platforms and niche blogs. Her most popular article has been shared nearly half a million times on Facebook alone. Sonya writes about the dating world as well as traveling the world. She founded her blog as a home for hopeless romantics and wanderlusts. She believes passionately in love even if she hasn’t quite gotten it right just yet. Sonya steals lunch breaks and midnights to do all of this, on the side of her full-time advertising career, with the simple yet powerful goal of inspiring others to believe in love and to believe in themselves.
Sonya Matejko
Sonya Matejko

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