Talk To Me Like Your Soul Is On Fire: To The Last Man Who Shall Love Me.
I want a man who talks to me about what makes him come alive in the world like his soul is on fire.
I want a man whom I can cry in front of, who cries in front of me — tears are an expression of the soul.
I want a man who loves movement — moving and being moved and moving others.
I want a man who is a creator, not a destroyer.
I want a man who thinks systems — a holistic perspective.
I want a man who looks me in the eye and the whole universe just falls away.
I want a man who is present.
I want a man who is embodied, who gets stuck in with physical activity — not just the stuff he finds sexy or fun, like acrobatics and sex and mountain-climbing, but who cooks, takes care of his living space, and gets into laundry, planting things, making things.
I want a man who gives a damn about the planet and its people, isn’t afraid to say it, to enjoy it, and to work actively towards making the world a better place.
I want a man who would rather be free and have nothing, than be chained and have everything.
I want a man who cannot help but smile, wonder and marvel, who lives in a perpetual wow.
I want a man who helps me to grow, who shows me things about the world I didn’t know existed, who can show me the stars inside myself.
I want a man who can be rough, dramatic, wild in bed, but with the most breathtaking sensitivity, who asks when I am in pain, who listens to my body when I can no longer speak.
I want a man who is conscious of what he puts into his body, and what effect that has on him and the planet.
I want a man who gets excited about shit I get excited about.
I want a man who would rather create a wild, shared adventure, than sit on the sofa watching a game of soccer.
I want a man who rarely gets bored.
I want a man who is comfortable with being uncomfortable, who revels in uncertainty and the deep mystery that underlies all life.
I want a man who believes in magic and miracles and love over everything.
I want a man who believes in the magnificence of all people, who checks his ego at the door, who can let go and facilitate a space for me to let go.
I want a man who can take care of me when I get sick, who knows how a blender, a juicer, a food processor work, and prepares food with gusto, artistry and love.
I want a man who is light years old in spirit and in touch with his inner child — so, forever young.
I want a man who rarely drinks, and never to distract himself from his emotions.
I want a man who takes life playfully.
I want a man who is happy to live simply, with few possessions.
I want a man who has little patience for television, thinks critically, and sees through the bullshit that is our widespread media industry.
I want a man who is unafraid to try anything — be it telescope-watching, pottery, painting, sailing, hitchhiking, or couch-surfing.
I want a man who doesn’t chase after things of finite value — money, status, wealth, degrees, possessions, marriage, beliefs, religion.
I want a man who lives in a constant state of gratitude about himself and the world.
I want a man who also gives me holy shit moments and magic moments — moments of sheer perceptual expansion, awe.
I want a man who can hold space for me.
I want a man who eats a lot of vegetables.
I want a man whose principles/values and practices/actions are dancing towards being in resonance.
I want a man who gives a damn, cares deeply but without attachment.
I want a man who would rather live in a tiny cottage in a forest with the riches of birdsong, a hundred thousand stars and rivers for company, than in a fancy mansion in suburbia with a gleaming car, two fridges, TV, four bedrooms, a mortgage, and no time to enjoy any of it.
I want a man who doesn’t measure his days by degree of productivity, but experiences them by degree of presence.
I want a man who has lived alone for a while, has experienced living in or with poverty or in a jungle, and knows both the loneliness and joy of such a life.
I want a man who is so excited to get out of bed in the morning that he leaps out of bed and dances in the shower.
I want a man who won’t settle for a stable job, house, car, wife, kids, pension, but thinks outside the box for what could be possible with his time here on Earth, and sees part of that journey as making others’ lives joyful, meaningful and more sustainable.
I want a man who sees poetry in all things, mundane and cosmic.
I want a man who can contemplate collapse, play with it, make himself and us as resilient as possible, regardless of what happens, rather than living in a world which may turn to ashes — a man who is a dark optimist/possibilist and who, despite the uncertainty of the future, approaches it not from a place of fear but a place of love, embracing and welcoming radical change, creative destruction and planning his life for something beyond Business-As-Usual.
I want a man who is dissatisfied with being normal.
I want a man who’d marry his bicycle before me.
I want a man who tells stories rich with metaphor.
I want a man who doesn’t naively believe that technology will save us or humanity will work things out or it’ll all be fine or the economy will work out or capitalism is the answer (light green environmentalism) — but takes responsibility for the change, and recognizes that grieving and love are two sides of the same coin (deep green, baby, deep green).
I want a man who walks on the knife-edge of uncertainty blindfolded, and instead of freezing in fear, leaps and cartwheels and laughs and loves, and recognizes that nothing is ever certain.
I want a man who feels. Who lets himself feel and express that, anywhere, everywhere.
I want a man whose whole being lights up when he smiles.
I want a man who remains, in his roughest depths, a facilitator and permaculturist.
I want a man I can be a child around, and who can be a child around me.
I want a man who doesn’t view life as striving or a struggle, but instead lives in flow.
I want a man who doesn’t think marriage is the only way to be together, or wants marriage to own me, or chooses marriage because he is afraid of loss.
I want a man who doesn’t think people are inherently stupid or worthless or bad.
I want a man who isn’t afraid to walk around naked in nature.
I want a man who truly values what I do to make the world a better place.
I want a man who is content to be, to inter-be; who is a human being, not just a human thinking or a human doing.
I want a man whom I could speak another language with, who would dare learn one.
I want a man who doesn’t snore.
I want a man who doesn’t see living at the edge of life as reckless, but abundant — edges are places where things meet, places of connections, patterns, possibilities.
I want a man who listens to my pain with empathy, and understands what empathy is and what it is not.
I want a man who can align his attention with his intention.
I want a man who is real, authentic, raw, genuine, fierce.
I want a man who is not afraid to fast, or hunger, but welcomes and is grateful for the blessing it brings.
I want a man who wants to know everything that is going through my mind/heart, and forces me to confront my inner truths, tells me to just say it, no matter how trivial or terrible I think it is.
I want a man who just says it back in return.
I want a man who doesn’t live for things but just because.
I want a man who is all of these things, or fucking open enough to become these things, without the wanting.
Nalini Singh loves thunderstorms and chasing baby grand pianos through her dreams. A facilitator from New Zealand, she is currently following her dream of becoming an Amazonian jungle warrior woman in South America and plotting her return in a sailing circus caravan back from Panama one day. Nalini is scarily passionate about everything from permaculture to creating spaces of love for young people to find what they give a sh*t about … and high-power blenders. She’s a dark optimist, believes in magic and a shameless raw food artist. Find her various social channels on her about.me.