The Loving Masculine: The Lost Key To Balance.

I have been studying the ancient traditions of Tao and Tantra in South East Asia, at the Tao Garden, learning from one of the most inspiring masters alive: Master Mantak Chia.

Immersed in a retreat with 111 exceptional healers, teachers, students and artists from 26 different countries, I have been gifted with the opportunity to witness human beings in their most vulnerable spaces: sexuality, relationships and love.

And what I see is an infinite potential. We are designed to work in perfect harmony with each other.

Our brains and emotional systems, when loved and acknowledged, awaken to incredible limitlessness. And the potential of our bodies exceed what we were told to be.

Men and women are meant to help each other to complete the awakening of our sexuality and our emotions. Both are keys to reach the balance we seek.

This is the beauty of our polarity. That is the magic of the Yin and Yang. The reason why falling in love with each other will heal humanity.

A World of Polarity

The Feminine, in the past 2000 years, has been overly passive (Yin) while the Masculine excessively violent (Yang).

Then, in the last century, we went through a historic process of women finding their strength in the imitation of masculine roles, a necessary step that brought big change to the world, but one that no longer serves feminine freedom.

In the last few years, we have witnessed the over-feminization of men seeking to reconnect with their Yin qualities.

We are reaching that balance now.

The Masculine

I feel that the masculine energy is rising in balance, leaving aside the old paradigms, and opening to deep listening of the feminine wounds.

I see men firmly established in their masculinity, allowing softness to be a part of their honest expression.

I’m observing men opening up to their vulnerability with the grounded approach of the wise warrior, inviting their feminine nature of intuition and compassion to develop.

Throughout history, men have been required to show up, no matter what their emotional needs were.

At the same time, we expect them to be in contact with their feelings, listening and caring. Demanding to see their softness, asking that they understand women who were never taught how to understand themselves.

They love and hold space for the wounded woman, but most of the times no one holds space for them.

I feel that it is time we acknowledge the wounded men. Because the unbalance of our society has hurt them as much as it pained women.

The Feminine

That Shakti is rising with all her splendor is no longer a secret.

Sisterhood creates a beautiful prism of potentialities where each woman reflects back to her sisters those aspects that we carry beautifully embodied. Together we are building role models for a Divine Feminine embodied in its full femininity, embracing compassionate and creative co-creation.

The desperate need for male protection and validation are being left behind, and we are standing strong in our womanhood as a whole, remembering archetypes of the strong and wise feminine that were repressed and shamed for millennia.

Coming in contact with our bodies and our sexual energy, long-forgotten keys to healing the wounds that only we can mend by ourselves and with our sisters’ help. No longer putting that weight on the masculine shoulders.

Yin and Yang bodies

The human body has seven main centers of energy, known in Eastern traditions as chakras.

Two of these energy vortices are very different in men and women. The second chakra is linked to sexuality, and the fourth chakra is linked to the heart.

The Heart

The heart chakra in the woman’s body is expressed in a beautiful outer form, the breast, which comforts and nourishes in a powerful expression of our potential for unconditional giving. In men, their physicality is much more like armor. Social roles they have had throughout history reinforced this, so their heart is harder to reach.

But that doesn’t mean it does not desire to be touched just as much. The endless search for connection, the craving for love, and the wish to be held and nourished, is one of the best kept secrets of the masculine.

I feel that it is time to help heal the Masculine by holding men close to our hearts. Sharing with them our wisdom: how to access the unconditional love that characterizes the Divine Feminine.

Loving them without asking for anything, nourishing them and holding space for their vulnerability, so they can relax into openness. Because emotions are our best intuitive guide, and when healthy and healed, the strength comes from a centered stable place.

The Sex

The second chakra is also manifested very different in men and women.

The female sexuality goes inside, receiving and sensitive when loved and respected, hiding and blocking when shamed.

The masculine sexuality goes outwards. Loving and caring when balanced, forcing and intrusive when unbalanced.

Here is where the Masculine can physically and emotionally heal the wounded woman, help her open up to her own sexuality by listening to her needs and accompanying her in the process of opening and reconnecting with her sexual energy.

Slowing down the rhythm of love-making, learning where the secret spots are in the sacred temple, and understanding how deep female sexuality is wired to female consciousness.

This is the beauty of our polarity. That is the magic of the Yin and Yang. The reason why falling in love with each other will heal humanity.

My Experience

In my world, among my tribe, this is already a reality. The needy feminine hysteria has yielded to a soft, empowered sensual Goddess. The forced over-sexually-driven, violent Masculine has been substituted by loving, caring, self-aware men keen to dive headfirst into their own vulnerability to rise up grounded in the real strength.

Men and women are walking towards the embodiment of the God and Godess qualities long spoken in ancient traditions of Tao and Tantra.

I am grateful to the men in my life for allowing me to show up for them, for opening their hearts to me, showing their vulnerability, and giving me the chance to connect with my purest and softest strength and unconditional love.

Gentlemen, when your hearts are open, you are really sexy.


wp-content-uploads-2015-06-laylaelkhadriArtist and journalist, Layla El Khadri has traveled the world, gathering and learning creative ways of living a conscious life and diving deep into the art of self-discovery. She has made it her mission to empower others to live to their fullest potential, to unleash the artist inside and own their lives back. You could contact her via her website or Facebook.


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