you & me

Pain Is Answered Prayers.

 

Now that I live on the other side of a life long dark night and work with others in their journeys, I struggle with how to fully express to people the true healing nature of pain.

How can I inspire others to courageously and eagerly embrace their healing journey?

How can I share with people who are genuinely baffled by their life challenges that all the answers they need are inside of themselves, hidden in the gift of darkness, just waiting for them to be brave enough to unwrap the package, and that the sooner they enthusiastically tear open the gift, the sooner they will find their way to the light on the other side.

I wish I could find the magic words to describe to people how every physical, mental, emotional and spiritual issue they have is an energetic response to them holding up the dam that is suppressing a flood of emotional release, a lifetime of pain.

How do I share the truth about the way the Divine works in our healing process?

How do I tell people that they know the truth, that they hear the whispers of the Divine every single day, but that they make a conscious decision to ignore their guidance?

How do I tell people that when they decide to ignore the whispers, the Divine then taps them on the shoulder?

“Psst! Yeah, over here. Remember that issue I told you about in all those gentle, subtle, quiet whispers? You still haven’t taken care of it. It really needs to be addressed.”

A little bit louder this time, more firmly, beckoning you to move forward with the healing for which you’ve been praying.

Because there it is, that is the truth, this is the healing you’ve been praying for and, unfortunately, there is no magic pill.

In your free will, you prayed for healing. Prayers are always answered, always. But unfortunately, praying for healing does not mean you wake up one morning healed. It means the Universe presents you over and over and over again with opportunities to heal, hence the whispers and the tap on the shoulder.

If you choose to ignore the whispers and the tap on the shoulder, the Universe will get forceful.

“Hey buddy, I am trying to answer your prayers over here! Why are you ignoring me?”

Then comes the Universal smack-down, a crisis of faith, the ultimate healing opportunity, a cancer diagnosis, job loss, marital breakups, etc., the ultimate in pain, not just for the sake of pain, but energetically and purposefully trying to answer your prayers and giving you yet another opportunity to go into your darkness to make peace with the truth.

Ouch! Enough, fine! I hear you, Universe!

So, how do we stop putting ourselves through these excruciatingly painful life experiences?

We tune into what hurts now. No more delays. No more painful lessons bringing it to our awareness over and over.

We listen to the soft, subtle, gentle whispers the first time.

We go back to our childhood and find what hurt. We go to our teenage years and dig up what we buried. We go to our failed relationships and our broken marriages to feel the pain. We take a very real, raw look at our parenting fails.

We lose our victim mentality by examining all that we invited and allowed into our world, then we bring all this back, full circle, to our foundational childhood issues and the beliefs those created about ourselves, others and the world.

Then we cry the never-released tears, we vent the repressed rage, we honor our deepest fears, and give voice to all our hidden shames, because therein lies every answer you will ever need. Hidden there is the reason behind everything you do that is not happy, healthy and harmonious.

“What you resist not only persists, but will grow in size.” ~ Carl Jung

Therefore, it is only when we stop resisting that we can begin the healing process. It is only when we begin to feel the pain that we can begin to make room for joy. It is only when we honor all the dark inside of ourselves, learn to love it as equally and unconditionally as we do our light, that we can become whole, living, loving expressions of the Divine.

***

Christie Del Vesco is a College Administrator and Professor, a Universalist Minister, a member of the RAINN (Rape, Abuse, & Incest National Network) Speakers Bureau and single mom. She’s a children’s advocate, a survivor of many forms of sexual violence, and a voice for the survivors who have yet to find their own. Chris is a firm believer that we go through what we do, to help others when they go through the same. She also believes if we would all just “be the change,” we can change the world.

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