you and me

A Letter to the Men Who Wish to Love Me.

 

I don’t want to be possessed.

I don’t want you to tell me I’m yours.
I don’t want to give in to the societal story line that love comes with need.

I don’t want you to need me.
I don’t need you.

It isn’t romantic to me when you tell me you need me. It isn’t romantic to me when I see you pretending to be something you aren’t, just so that I’ll stay with you. It isn’t romantic to me to hear the words “I can’t live without you.”
I want you to understand that needing isn’t a sign of love. It’s a sign of co-dependence. It’s a sign that something isn’t healthy. Something has gone awry. It makes me think that you are a parasite who wishes to feed off me.
I will not be your drug. I will not give my blood to a vampire. I will not help your addiction.

Ignore the movies that show lovers as soul mates with the string of words “I need you.”

I need you to need nothing.
I need you to be complete on your own.
I want you to neither want nor need me to complete you.

I want you to not need love, but at the same time, I do want you to be willing to receive it.

This I cannot compromise on.
If you need love, it’s not for me to give it you, it’s you who needs to give it to yourself. But if you are already full with your own self-love, I want to give you more. I want to overflow your cup with love, knowing that there is no cup to fill. There is no limit to the soulful heart. There is no cap on love. It is abundant and it ought to be shared. Freely. Unconditionally. With no strings attached.

I don’t see the point in shallow relationships. I’m here to love you. I’m here to grow with you. I’m here to challenge you and make you feel safe all at once. I’m here to stand by your side as you heal your past wounds. I’m here to strengthen your strengths, not weaken your energy for my own gain. I’m here to love you unconditionally with a force so strong that anyone unworthy would be intimidated.

I’m here to make you realize that you are a king, and I’ll treat you as such every day.
I’m not doing this to be adorned as a queen, because I already know I am one.
I know my own power, and I know my own beauty.
All I ask is that you know your own kingdom, and step into your role with humble honor.

Forget what society told us relationships are supposed to be.
I don’t need to be your girlfriend, and I don’t need you to be my boyfriend.
Let’s strip off these titles just as easily as we strip off our clothing.
I see no need for attachment.
I have no desire for dependence.
I am not a half looking to be filled or made complete by another.
I am whole, and so are you.

I don’t want anything from you.
I just want to love you freely.

Let’s forget our names and our bodies, let’s get enraptured in the divine union of God and Goddess coming together.

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Jenna Galbut is a truth-teller devoted to minimizing suffering in our world. At 21, she healed her lifelong depression on her own, then went to Cornell university to study Psychology, Neurology, and Philosophy in order to find out how. Jenna works every day to bring more love and light into our shared world. As a mental-health-hacker and a spiritual intuitive, she helps clients and audiences break free from their limitations. She’s a teacher, a writer, a speaker, a yogini, a creator, and above all, a human who deeply cares about other humans. You can find her at a music festival, frolicking in a glen with her husky, having a deep talk with strangers, sipping tea while pretending to have a British accent, or in used book stores, sniffing books like it’s her job. Or more simply, you can find her on her website.

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