poetry

Enough Is Enough. {poetry}

 

I am listening, I choose to hear life.
I am watching, I choose to see life.
I am breathing, I choose to live life.
I am alive, I choose to love life.
I am here.

It wasn’t enough.

Days flowed into weeks.
Weeks spilled over into months.
A monstrous energy lurked silently within my subconscious.
Fear hammered a display of complexities into my clean canvas.
Once a beautifully alive and colorful painting, I was slowly becoming saturated in stains of my mind’s th-ink.
Every tainted thought manufactured a new spiral of despair, with me gravitating deeper toward an unknown void.
A slinky on turbulent travels, I twisted and jerked my way down a stairwell of unknown, descending without pause.
My rainbow colors faded with the wear and tear of each of my fragile limbs.
Depression stabbed me in my heart and used my innocent blood to paint lies into every mirror I looked into.
The smeared glass reflected back to me his-story after her-story after their-story.
Each novel narrated loud and clear in my head, only my character had done a disappearing act.
I was history.
Growing heavy, my delicate frame had offered itself unintentionally as a slave to misery.
My eyes fear-drops overflowed into parachutes of unspeakable whys.
Up in flames went my daring creativity, every heart-rhyme and soul-song now a cloud of smoke, and I choked on every word.
My expressive articulation froze within a never-ending moment in time.

I woke in a daze, numb to the world.
I faced each day, mask upon mask.
I bathed in solitude, washing my wounds.
I slept in recovery, dreaming of peace.
I prayed consistently, remaining faithful.

Who was I? My knowing had faded.
Where was I? Unfamiliarity surrounded me.
What was I? Questions and doubts rose around me like fierce tides.
My heart had slammed its doors, with me on the outside, my face no longer a fit.
My mind had lost control and I was a prisoner, chained to its doubt-bursts.

Months spilled over into weeks.
Weeks flowed into days.
Days melted into moments of my years and nows. Who, what and where was I now? I asked myself.
Amongst the mental chaos I felt a flicker of hope.
Beautiful how a child’s face radiates pure innocence, a perfect savior when falling from grace.
Three blood-breasted robins sang prosperous songs to me, awakening my ear-slums.
I breathed in Gaia’s sweet air while taking each step upon her throne.
Freedom flew into my arms, its feathers stroking me into a sweet surrender.
Solidified anxieties began to melt away and my candlelit crown became ablaze with flickering affirmations that softened my hardened perceptions.
I merged with creation all around me, and danced and sang with its miracles and wonders.

I have eyes, I am worthy of experiencing creation as I see it.
I have a nose, I am deserving of experiencing creation as I smell it.
I have ears, I am invited into experiencing creation as I hear it.
I have a mouth, I am trusted to speak of creation as I spell it.
I am a single soul-star imprinted into a cosmic blanket, a tiny stitch in God’s eternal weave.
Crowds of cheering cells celebrate me for my conscious choice to grow beyond what had been.
My trophy heart glows as I polish it with unconditional love, I see myself in its reflection.

I am listening, I choose to hear life.
I am watching, I choose to see life.
I am breathing, I choose to live life.
I am alive, I choose to love life.
I am here, I choose to be enough.

I am enough.

***

Zoe Michael is a passionate Reiki Healer, who also enjoys offering additional services which include Intuitive Energy Massage, Sound Healing and Soul Journey card readings. Zoe has a wide array of skills with experience and professional work within Retail Management, Theater In Education, Acting, Student Workshop Facilitating and Teaching. As a passionate people-worker and lover of all things creative, Zoe has decided to continue on her soul path of supporting others through their spiritual awakening. She is currently in the process of writing a book which will share some of her most intimate and transformative life experiences. Through her book, she aims to empower the lives of others by teaching self-acceptance, forgiveness and self-love. Zoe wishes to continue her poetic journey, and aims to inspire and support people on their path of self-discovery and enlightenment. Zoe currently manages a Liz Earle skincare account, and spends her free time offering Reiki healing and mentoring young business entrepreneurs for The Prince’s Trust.

***

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