What You Need When They Leave You for Another. {poetry}
{source}
This is going to hurt for quite a while, my love.
You will need help, seek it out.
You will need to roll out untold amounts of self-kindness.
You will need to accept that you may never understand it yet try your hardest to not become lost in it.
You will need a lot of courage to face this in the healthiest way possible.
You will need to practice patience, my love. Healing deep wounds won’t happen spontaneously — wouldn’t that be glorious?
You will need to know that good friends love you when they say You don’t need to feel this way, though you still will.
You will need to seek out beauty in any way you can, as a constant reminder that it does still exist.
You will need to create as much beauty as you can, as a reminder that it does still exist.
You will need to be careful of well-meaning folk who offer advice but have not experienced this same pain.
You will need to be cautious of social media that throws quick pithy platitudes your way. If you could click your fingers and just let it go, of course you fucking would. But you can’t. You, babe, are going to have to feel this abyss of darkness to your very core.
You will need to create space for yourself at times, away from all those who love and support you. This is more than okay. Breathe, renew, explore.
You will need to cry. A lot! Scream, smash things, converse with your anger. Just be sure to balance this with genuine acts of self-love.
You will need to move this dark, engulfing energy out of your body. So move your body, in any way you can!
You will need to hold tight to whom you know yourself to be.
You will need to make sure you do not define yourself by what has happened to you. Vitally important.
You will need to use your intuition to navigate through the mess that trails behind this event.
You will experience loss, but eventually you will gain.
You will need to be kind to yourself. Always. All ways.
If you are unsure, then I will tell you that you are stronger than you know, beautiful beyond comprehension, and your beating heart deserves love and expansion. Give this to yourself, and in time, both your inner and outer world will be a magical place of love and joy.
Find ways to express your experience to and for yourself. This is a private act of self-love. Or, share it if you feel moved to as I have done here with my poem that follows. It is not a profound showing of my heart but the words were a torrent of pain that screamed their way out of me in one fast move of my pen. They have sustained me for many months. They are helping me heal.
It was written while still in the depths of pain and suffering, but it emerged from intuition and a desperate need to inhabit a different internal heart space. There was a profound peace held for days after as I had allowed myself to just open to what was inside — this misery bound around my heart and constricting any thought that life could be beautiful again was slowly unwinding.
There I was, standing alone and unsure of my future, knowing it was time to start a new story — in my heart, mind, and in my connections with the people I love.
A new story will open to us all if we play our part in focusing on what matters most to us. Love, freedom, play, exploration, curiosity. Hold these spaces within for yourself. You’re intelligent, you can prescribe your own healing actions. You may travel or dance or sing instead of writing through your pain, but know what you need and go about incorporating it into your gorgeous new story.
Oceans of love to you.
***
She’ll Be Gone Soon
They hurt you, darling.
Of this I know,
They plunge
a knife
and then
so happily they go.
But life
is life
and time will show,
that causing pain
brings zero gain.
They have their own
dance of sorrow
to come,
while you, my dear
could invite in love,
some fun.
You’ve paid your price,
curled tight
In a ball.
It’s time to shed this fear,
trust life
shed it all
Take this time
to create
true beauty,
soul-deep, mind wild
body free.
She’ll be gone soon, darling,
Of this I know you will see,
She’ll be gone soon, darling.
And you?
Be wild, be free.
***
Rachel Fry is a writer, mother, organizer, and creator, who is currently embarking on a new career of writing both non-fiction and children’s picture books. She is studiously working on her first manuscript. Rachel is passionate about sharing stories, writing, travel, fitness, wellness, children’s education, cultural diversity, art, sustainability, music, and contributing in any way she can to add more love and beauty into our world. You could contact her via her website or Instagram.
***
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March 9, 2018 at 9:00 am[…] When They Leave You For Another […]