Tuning into the In-Between.
This feeling. This in-between. The seasons are pulling and swaying and swirling together, one day more spring and another day still the remnants of winter. Yesterday sunning myself in the yard, today a sweater. It’s cold, but warm too. It’s dense, yet light. It’s a bit barren, yet filled with magic, divine spark. It’s super raw and tender, yet expansive and hopeful.
This is what it is to grow. To evolve. To push forth. To bloom.
In a culture of forever striving, it is our human tendency to favor the illusion of solid ground to land on. These in-between times, which we dance in and out of all of the time, can be a bit disorienting.
We don’t know what to hold on to. What is solid? What is fading away? What is true here? What are we letting go of? What’s next? So much is not known.
That’s part of the mystery, that we do not get to know.
What do we tune into then? The contraction and density of winter? The expansion and lightness of spring? Where do we direct our attention? Where do we find our ground?
It’s interesting to notice this pull towards ground, towards a direction to place our center of gravity and focus. We are so conditioned in this way, to always veer towards what follows next.
One of the teachings of the in-between is how to tune in to the now. The present, in between the past and the future. A place we rarely root ourselves in, that is always changing from one moment to the next.
How do we find ground in the present moment? In the heart. Tuning back into ourselves. We can always find solid ground in our own hearts, living inside the earth of our bodies and tuning us into the life force pulsing the blood through our veins.
We carry the ground within us.
Traditionally, the in-between offers us the most fertile ground of spiritual and emotional growth because of the very nature of there being no ground, so we see ourselves and our stuff more clearly than when we think we have a grasp on things. That’s also why it’s uncomfortable, why we want to move on to the next thing. The mind doesn’t like this space very much.
Whatever is tender or raw or a deeper ache rising from the deeper swells of the heart… this is the pain of growth.
Our hearts and souls and beings are stretching open, and that kind of hurts a bit. We see the stuff that the light of love brings to the surface.
The in-between is a place where the shadows dance and the light sparkles, we see things we didn’t know before.
We are trained to fear this place. The in-between. The void. So, we get disoriented and forget that the place to tune into is right inside of us, our hearts.
This is where we meet with the great Mystery, where everything and anything is possible. Where anything can shift, anything can heal, and anything can happen.
In this strange, cosmic waiting room, we get to make friends with change, experience the alchemy of grief, gather up all the bits of ourselves, approach what we didn’t even see or know before, make friends with what has felt unlovable and, with great curiosity and gentleness, metabolize our stuff and love ourselves into freedom.
Dr. Nandi Hetenyi is a shamanic healer, grief midwife, writer, teacher and soul-whisperer. She received her doctorate in clinical psychology from CIIS in addition to spending over 15 years studying and practicing Buddhism, Yoga, meditation, shamanic journey, ritual, energy healing and personal growth. She envisions a world where we feel comfortable in our own skins and are happy about being a human. A world where everyone loves and values themselves as a part of the whole, where self-loathing is an oddity rather than the usual, and the soul’s truth is valued as a gift from the Divine in service of our highest good. Shedding light on the truth of the soul’s story liberates the sacred within to feel comfortable in your own skin. You can follow Dr. Hetenyi on Instagram and find out more about her work on her website.