archives, poetry

I Am Woman: Submitting to the Fire of Chaos. {poetry}

Shakti — she lives and breathes within each and every one of us, male or female.

She brings with her the power of the void, the depths of the primordial unknown, and she calls to us, and asks that we walk the path of transformation, the path of the spiral.

While her movements throughout our lives may seem to bring chaos, these are the cycles of growth, for it is one of the laws of this reality that those things which have been built must often be swept away so that the new can be given birth. 

To live on Papatuanuku (the Maori name for our Earth Mother) is to experience duality. As we look around, we see we are surrounded by pairs of opposites. These same opposing forces exist within us. Manifested as our dual natures of female and male. Male is above, female is below. Male is doing, female is being. Male is control, female is surrender. Male is change, female is acceptance.

Male brings the power of the light, female mixes in the depths of the unknown as she plays with the powers of the void. The male force is the ruler of all he knows, but it is she who brings forth all that he sees.

Can we find the strength to let go and fall? Can we embrace the power and gift of surrender? Can we enter the fires of the unknown? What do we find there? We find darkness. The nothing. The chaos. The place we are taught as a people to avoid at all cost. The chaos of the void. The birthplace of all life.

The Bible talks of the nothingness that preceded all of creation. This place is the void. All things come of it. Manifested in the world as female energy, it is powerful, it is strong, it is the power of the human subconscious. This power lies within every human being, regardless of gender.

It is the power of woman. The power of being, surrender and letting go, submitting all to the fires of transformation and chaos.

Why are we scared of the unknown and the unknowable? Why must we know everything? Does the knowing we claim really bring us the stability we seek?

Shakti embodies the power of the void — it is the womb where all life must begin in the darkness. The part of us all we are afraid to look into. The imbalance within us, our rejection of our female side, we see reflected in the outside world, as we focus on doing and do not embrace the equal action of being.

To bring about the unification of the Sacred Masculine and Divine Feminine within each and every one of us is one of the great works of these times, and will have profound effects on the world we live in. May the ancient grandmothers bless us as we take our steps on this journey.

***

I am Woman.
I am Shakti.
I am the one who says yes to life
And embraces its beautiful chaos.
I am woman,
And I didn’t get here
By dancing in the field of flowers and rainbows.
I found my way here,
Through the darkness
Of pain and chaos.
I pushed through to the depths
Of the lies and the demons
I carried in the very cells of my body.
And I uprooted myself
So I could be born again.
Now I wear with honor
The scars that mark the path of my journey
Through the fires of hell
And becoming.
I am Woman.
People say,
Who the fuck does she think she is?
This is who I am:
I am Woman.
So changed.
No longer the woman I used to be.
I am she who dares
To love all
With an open heart.
With true courage,
I embrace the pain an open heart brings,
For its sisters are strength and growth.
I am woman.
We are woman.
And this is who the fuck we are.

***

Kim Turfrey is a mother of two who lives in New Zealand and enjoys writing. She was born with a disability, and has used crutches for her whole life. She spent the majority of the first 12 years of her life living mainly in a hospital, away from her family, and now she writes about life as she sees it. You could contact Kim via Facebook.

***

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