you & me

Heal the Shadow of the Inner Mother Within.


I know some pretty brilliant, incredibly tapped-in, multidimensional humans who are incredibly intolerant towards their own humanity.

Often when we are chatting, I find myself saying, “Hey, can you be a little nicer to my friend in there?” because they can be so cruel to the parts of themselves that are wounded and really need more love.

Perhaps one could call it spiritual bypassing, but I see it more as a challenge with the immanence part of spiritual healing — bringing the divine archetypal realities into the heart, which is where we truly experience the deepest kind of transcendence possible in human flesh. It can be easier to be out there than in here, which we are culturally taught is a dangerous place to be.

Every single archetype has a shadow and a divine side. We easily confuse dark, as in the Dark Feminine or the Dark Mother, with the shadow side of the Mother archetype because culturally we deny that there is a shadow side to the Mother. Instead, we romanticize the shadow as dark and continue to act it out in ways that are unhelpful to really changing our world.

This also creates a crisis for mothers and for the archetype of the Mother as she lives within us, society and inside the earth herself.

What good is any of our work if we are still so intolerant of our own humanity?

If we are in constant battle with the sides of us we wish to cut off, disconnect, ignore, profit off of, mutate into something we like or kill off so that we can survive in this world?

Bringing the archetype of the Great Mother down into the heart is a radical act of looking into the dimensions of this Divine Feminine energy as she truly lives inside our psyche as we have internalized her in our lives.

We all have an internal Mother figure within, one that is not always as good and loving as we’d like to think.

She is the unconscious attitude we have towards our deepest hearts. Our humanity.

And, the shadow aspects of the Mother are truly expressions of the Wounded Feminine that have been passed down for millennia through the collective unconscious, through the human psyche and delivered to us through the flesh and bone of human mothers in deep, deep challenge in modern society.

How we truly love our inner worlds and honor the realms of our psyche is to access the energy of the Great Mother archetype as she lives within us.

To understand how her shadow unconsciously runs our system and keeps us locked in conflict and fear within our own hearts. How this energy within us makes us afraid of ourselves and keeps us in a cycle of chronic self-improvement, addiction and/or co-dependence with life.

This work isn’t about now becoming a radiant embodiment of the divine Great Mother herself. The ego really likes that and most of us actually already know how to do that. Unfortunately, it can be at the expense of taking the totality of our humanity with us.

This is about integrating the positive characteristics of the Great Mother with her shadow expressions that are living inside our psyche that show up in our innermost relationship with ourselves, aka self-love, confidence and connection to love, and how it ripples out into our relationship with life, purpose, people, health and prosperity.

When we can tap into these positive divine qualities and use them to heal the shadow of the Inner Mother within, we become good enough mothers to ourselves.

We transform our attitude towards our humanity to one that is accepting, attentive, attuned, knowing, trusting, holding, honoring, respectful, supportive, wise, confident, compassionate, loving and powerful because she is rooted in a love that rises from the earth and beats your human heart.

There is too much war in this world, and we are truly too much at war within ourselves. Immanence is bringing the divine energy into our human flesh. It is the feminine aspect of embodiment of the Mother, which is the foundation of sovereignty, inner peace and true freedom.


Dr. Nandi Hetenyi is a psychospiritual healer, soul mentor and writer. She has carved out her own path based on 20+ years of clinical experience and an equal amount of time studying and practicing Buddhism, yoga, meditation, shamanic healing, ritual and energy healing. After recovering herself from addiction and experiencing an awakening to her soul, she fused her knowledge of psychology and trauma with both her studied and lived experience of shamanic and Buddhist healing modalities, creating an innovative approach to healing the soul wound at the root of so much addiction, shame and ongoing trauma. You can follow Dr. Hetenyi on Instagram and find out more about her work on her website.


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