To the Villanelles Out There: It Will All Fall Into Place.
Keep wearing that fluffy pink dress in the middle of the street and smile at the people who stare at you.
To all the misfits, rebels, creatives and sensitives who feel out of place, the world loves your uniqueness. You are the ones who tell people to “go get a real life,” as Villanelle is famous for saying to an Instagram influencer who wanted to photograph a well-dressed Villanelle in one episode of Killing Eve.
We live in a society where we must conform to a bunch of rules. From work, to gender, to school, to how we socialize (both on-screen and IRL), we’re told how to do things. Everyone says we live in an individualistic society, but it’s BS. We’ve become shallow robots, echoing what everyone else thinks and says, because we don’t want to stick out like sore thumbs.
Everything is done for show, for our followers on social media platforms.
I think that’s the lure of TV series like Killing Eve and Amazon Prime’s Hanna, whose main characters don’t care what others think of them. In fact, it’s their Fuck that attitude that makes them charming in the first place. Where Eve Polastri, in Killing Eve, is a by-the-book, straight-laced character who tries not to take up too much space and follows rules, Villanelle is the opposite of that.
Yes, I know Villanelle is a psychopath, and by no means am I saying that’s okay, nor am I saying I’d like to be one, however, I think the show’s message is to take up more space, especially in reference to women. For too long, women have been pegged in, caged in, being the responsible ones, and it’s time to spread our wings and fly.
I know how it feels to want to live in a society that has no excessive rules.
Half of my my astrological readings imply this: black moon Lilith in Sagittarius (denoting a desire for freedom, adventure and parties), main life path number is five (denoting a desire for adventure, pleasure and freedom), and a metal horse on the Chinese zodiac (denoting a need for change and freedom).
Oddly enough, my second life path number is eight (a very grounded number) and on the zodiac, I’m a Virgo sun and Scorpio moon, both of which are introverted, responsible nerds. I sometimes wonder if I was born on the wrong signs, as it seems now more than ever, I wish I didn’t have fibromyalgia and the COVID-19 pandemic wasn’t going on.
All I want to do is just book a flight to some exotic place, hop on a luxury yacht, and party till the sun goes down. However, between having fibromyalgia and the fact there’s a pandemic going on, that’s not happening soon. In the meantime, I’m trying to learn to relax and not take life too seriously. It will all fall into place, and when it does, it will be the best thing in my life.
In the meantime, it’s totally okay to be as I am. I don’t have to fit into a mold if I don’t want to.