you & me

Open Your Heart Back up to Loving the Wild Within.


There is a caged one living inside each of us. One that was first caught in the wild of our culture and placed in a corner.

Slowly over time, we’ve continued to place this one in the corner until that corner became a cage.

A cage for the wild one, the too-much one, the not-enough one, the one whispering inconvenient truths to others, to ourselves and to the world around us… the one we cannot make money off of, control or change, or gain from in the worldly ways so disparate and disconnected from the satisfying life that we were designed for.

This caged, wild one within is treated in our inner planes the way the wild is treated in our world.

It is not respected. It is slaughtered, commodified, wrangled into domestication or dissociation, manipulated for profit, milked of wisdom that is then painted into a picture of depth rather than honoring the intimacy of what its depths are truly rooted in.

Underneath our chronic dissatisfaction that makes so much stress in our body, beneath the chaos of confusion and rage, this caged wild one roars with a grief that wants to wake us up. A grief that is love itself releasing her holy roar for the sake of breaking the heart open to what has been done. To open the door of the cage, to let love roam wild, caring, compassionate, kind, open and free.

Grief has a voice that has been domesticated, dominated by our cultural narrative that she belongs relegated in the shadows. Permissible for short amounts of time when someone we love dies. Denied the reality of all the big and small ways this animal body, this divine heart that loves so deeply, lives in the tidal waves of loss and gain on a daily basis.

Impermanence is the spiral of life.

We dance in and out of loss and gain, mystery and knowing, grief and utter aliveness.

Yet, when this caged, wild one is ignored, we dampen our access to aliveness.

Our fear of death and our fear of really opening to the life that wants to live through us become simultaneously terrifying.

Because opening the caged door, roaring our grief of our treatment of the wild within, represents not only an ego death, but the death of domestication we have mistakenly called culture, civilization or playing God when we are truly, actually afraid of God, of the depth and breadth of our innate alive, erotic nature.

The sacred, the holy is wild, unpredictable, flowing nature herself.

We are wild.

When we ourselves have caged up the wild soul within us, we paint a domesticated, saintly, flowy picture of the Divine that wears costumes of the cultural, perhaps New Age, norm that is commodified and pushed into forms we can make money off of. Selling to pain points we can never make enough money from because it gaslights us to the cause of this true, deep pain we haven’t been able to explain.

The grief of the wild, caged one within yearning to break free.

Because our grief is love, it is the wisdom of the heart that cracks us open to the lived wisdom of the body that often goes against the grain of everything we are sold.

We forgot that our mind longs to serve the wild one within, to forge a deep, respectful partnership in order to steward something that cannot currently live in the stratosphere of culture, of what we call living, that we absolutely must allow to die. And it is dying right now.

When this way of living cracks open, we can no longer turn a blind eye to how we treat the wild around us.

How animals are abused or made money off of. How our oceans are choking and we fear being alone in the wild, as though the Divine would stalk us and want to hurt us. It is not the Divine that wants to hurt us, but our culture that wants to cut the life off of the wild nature of life that wants to spill out through us.

Divine isn’t just saintly and pretty, but wild and raw too. Roaring not only with rage or anger, which our society has actually made more acceptable than grief, but with grief. We turn away from grief. We have been taught to fear it, because when we pay attention to grief, ours or others’, our hearts open and we are changed.

We cannot unsee its truth.

The roar of grief is the love, howling and reclamation of sanity and respect and honor for what truly gives us our life force, our creative potential, our genius and our capacity to turn this ship around before it’s too late.

Grief is a holy living force inside love.
To love is to grieve.
To grieve is to love.

To rage with grief is to open the door of the cage.
To howl with grief is to wake up all that’s been dormant and domesticated by false days and nights.
To moan with love is to pull the love and grief up through the heart, to open our bodies, our wildness, back to life again.

Grief wakes us up to what really matters.

It gives us the power to stand in truth, to fight for what we believe in.
It reminds us that life is precious.
Life is wild, unpredictable, liminal in nature.
It is wisdom that longs to co-create with us.

Life is longing for us as much as we are longing for life.

Our grief is the opening within this longing, a longing for what we have been taught to fear.

Our grief helps us work out our fear and mistrust of the Divine, to remember it’s not the Divine that’s hurt us, but misguided wild of other humans so afraid of the Divine they try to be God themselves.

Our grief opens our hearts back up to loving the wild within, to feeling the power of this aliveness, this love, this passion, this clear seeing of this one precious life we’ve been gifted… one in which we are guided by the stars, and in which the earth is quite literally and constantly speaking to the wild within us to guide us back to living in sane balance with all that is.

Your grief heals you back to life.

More love, not less.


Dr. Mia Hetenyi is a psychospiritual healer, soul mentor and writer. She has carved out her own path based on 20+ years of clinical experience and an equal amount of time studying and practicing Buddhism, yoga, meditation, shamanic healing, ritual and energy healing. After recovering herself from addiction and experiencing an awakening to her soul, she fused her knowledge of psychology and trauma with both her studied and lived experience of shamanic and Buddhist healing modalities, creating an innovative approach to healing the soul wound at the root of so much addiction, shame and ongoing trauma. You can follow Dr. Hetenyi on Instagram and find out more about her work on her website.


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