I can’t recall feeling angry with Dad for his death, perhaps that is still to come. I have felt angry that I’ve had to deal with any of it at all.
When I first stepped into the county jail, I knew his pain, so I share his message on behalf of all the unknown people behind the inmate statistics data.
We get sick days, not mental health days. It’s okay to have a cold, but it’s not okay to say, “I can’t handle this crap today, I’m staying home.”
How could they? How selfish? How ignorant for anyone to think they have the right to judge such tragedy and loss? How dare you?
All who want to die in any given moment feel crippling disconnection... but the silence of shame and the disease of perfectionism keeps us from saying it.
I can't just sit here and not say anything because 'sobriety' is a big deal to some people and a life or death matter to all of us addicts.
Tonight we will run with the wild horses of our tribe streaking across the twilight sky, calling out our names and demanding the night to release us.